This blog is dedicated to finding, sharing and discussing a variety of topics around the struggles our clients and audience go through. Each episode we discuss a key concept that many humans struggle with. To give you a variety of perspectives for you to see the concept through so you can find one that makes it feel easier to deal with.
And if you prefer to listen, this episode is available as a Podcast or a Video.
Let Me Tell You A Story…
Instead of my usual blog posts with lots of information for you to read and use in your life, today I want to tell you a story. And this story is also being written / read / told live every Tuesday and Thursday at 8:30pm GMT on (hopefully!) YouTube, Facebook and LinkedIn between 12th November and 24th December. Click these links to subscribe and join us for the next instalment!
Stories have been used for centuries to share wisdom and ideas within our species. And this idea for this particular story came to me
I find stories are the best way to get a message across. It is why we like to read books, watch TV series and films. Because stories are a great way to share a message by inviting the reader / watcher / listener to be a part of the story. To become the character in their imagination.
And that’s what this story will do. It will invite you to become the main character, Morgan, and become the hero / heroine of the story!
There will 13 chapters and this will constitute the first draft of this story before I send it to publishers and become a published author. Which has always been a dream of mine! So thankyou to you for joining me and holding me to account to get this planned, written, shared, edited and finally published! Without you, I would probably let myself off the hook (like I have effectively been doing all year since the idea came to me!) and this would never get done.
So I hope you enjoy these 13 blog posts, and if you want to send me any ideas or ask any questions to guide the story or to make it make more sense to you, then please don’t hesitate to get in touch. I look forward to hearing your thoughts, but for now let us dive straight in…
Read Chapter One HERE.
Chapter Two is HERE.
CHAPTER THREE – You Don’t Know What You Don’t Know
I really hate that alarm… Anyone who says they are up and awake and don’t set an alarm must be lying! I get enough sleep, I get good sleep as well I think, but yet I still wake up tired and urgh in the morning. Less so on weekends, but then I don’t tend to set an alarm on the weekends and don’t really get up until at least mid-morning, because, what’s the point?
But anyways, I’m sure there are people out there who enjoy getting up for work! Maybe I’ll be one of them when I am living the life I am dreaming about. My big house, my new car, the rabbit, the massages… The job I want to be doing…
I wonder what that job will be…
No!
Not now! I’m not going to lie here daydreaming all morning when the boss said what they said yesterday. So I’m going to get up and get sorted, I have lunch to make as I didn’t do it last night, and I need to make a good impression on the new owners so that I get to keep this job!
That I don’t like…
Standing in the shower my mind flicks back to the text conversation from yesterday. Some people really do get to live the life they want to live? But what if they just made that up to get people to join and watch the webinar? Well, it’s a free webinar and I’ve got nothing better to do, so no harm in attending and finding out I guess!
I dry myself and get dressed, sort my hair and face and head to the kitchen to get my lunch together before heading out the door to work.
Raining.
I turn around to grab my other coat and umbrella and try again.
Back outside, I put the umbrella up and it instantly turns inside out. It’s not even that windy!!
So this is how today is going to go is it?
I look and say thanks to the sky, then put my head down and trudge to work, dropping my broken umbrella in the first bin I see, and trying to avoid the puddles because I probably shouldn’t spend the money I’ve saved on those new boots when I might be losing my job soon!
Bloody wobbly paving slabs… I shudder as the cold water splashes up the back of my leg and all over my other shoe.
I’m really hope my spare socks are in my bag…
I arrive at work, luckily at least it isn’t far, hang my coat up, check my bag for my socks (which aren’t there…), Bob is doing his usual scurrying around making sure things are done and others are getting on, but some are standing staring into space or getting their morning coffee fix.
Me, I think I’ll nip to the toilets and squeeze as much water from my socks as I can and maybe add some paper towels to my boots.
It really is going to be a great day! All sarcasm intended…
But I suppose there is one upside; it is Friday! Apparently, that’s a reason to be happy according to someone who just came in the bathroom and saw me drying my socks under the hand dryer! I’m not sure how the weekend is any better than the weekdays, but maybe it is because you don’t have to go to work? Maybe that person has a family, or a partner they actually like. I haven’t seen mine for a good couple of weeks as we had another fight about money… Apparently saving money to buy boots and pay bills as opposed to just getting a credit card and spending every last penny on whatever you want isn’t the “done thing”!
I guess we just aren’t compatible anymore. But that’s OK. Plenty more fish in the sea as Dad would say! I’m not sure how I feel about that idea, but that’s the least of my worries right now.
I think this is as dry as my socks are going to get, and besides, my fingers are starting to burn now and the whole room smells of damp, sweaty feet! Lovely… I open the window a little to let it air out.
Even more lovely is trying to get damp socks back onto wrinkly, soggy feet and then putting them back into wet boots. It is just a rumour that you can get ill from having cold, wet feet, right? I’m more likely to get trench foot… But I doubt that will happen in the space of a few hours when they will gradually dry.
Until it is time to walk home again later. But maybe I will avoid that wobbly paving slab that seems to move when I remember exactly where it was the last time I trod on it!
Work today seems different.
Everyone seems to be in except for a couple of the higher managers, but maybe they are on a meeting somewhere, and most people seem to be getting on. The boss is tucked away in the office, and every hour or so the assistant pops in with a tray of fresh drinks and sometimes a plate of biscuits.
I wonder what it is like to discuss the sale of something you have built. I guess its worth will be different to you than your buyers? What if they can’t agree on terms? Will the boss insist on the buyers keeping all the staff as part of the deal? Will they agree and then go back on the deal? Can they even be forced to keep us all for a certain amount of time?
My forehead is starting to burn… I wonder why it keeps doing that?
I think focusing on my work will be a better option! Maybe I’ll even work through lunch to show that I am a good worker and worth them keeping so I can keep trying to pay my rent, eating and saving up for my new boots.
Besides, what else could I do?
Anything I try will just be criticised by everyone else, and I just want a peaceful life… And if I did try something and it went wrong then I’d be back at square one, or lower, with no money and a whole queue of people lining up to say, “I told you so!” I’ll bet none of them will offer me a sofa to sleep on either when I get evicted for not paying the rent…
But I would so like to be doing something else… This job is so soul destroyingly boring! There are so many other things I could do with my life. So why aren’t I? I could have been an explorer, or worked with animals. Or done something else with my Geography exam results. Wait, my right ear is starting to burn. It’s quite uncomfortable actually!
Ping!
And now my phone is going… Forgot to put it on silent again! Oh, its my friend reminding me about the webinar tomorrow. I hadn’t forgotten you know! But it is nice to receive a reminder, I wonder if they sent it only to me though? Or has my number been added to a big, long list of people? Stop. Does that really matter?
I really do need to get on with some work, I am so distracted this week! Flitting between this, that and the other, probably being watched from a distance to see if I am good enough to keep on the books…
What am I supposed to be doing today anyways? Oh right, I see, I reckon if I get on then I could get that project done that has the deadline next week. Maybe that will impress the new bosses! That’s what I am going to do then. After I get a quick drink top up first.
Before I know it its 5pm and time to leave.
I got quite a lot done in the end around my drinks breaks and eavesdropping on other people’s conversations and daydreaming sessions. I feel like it was quite a successful day, and I even got told great job by Bob! He was probably relieved that someone was actually doing some work rather than leaving it all to him to be honest, but it was a compliment, so I’ll take it.
My boots are near enough dry as I put on my coat and head out the door, expecting to see the torrential rain as it was this morning. But I actually get pleasantly surprised! Its now only a light drizzle. Still lots of dodgy wobbly paving slabs to try and avoid, but it is Friday so if I get soaked again at least my boots will have the whole weekend to dry.
Once home I do my usual Friday night routine; dinner, shower, PJs… It used to include a bath, but the water and gas rates have increased so much it just makes me feel guilty to indulge myself and then it’s just not worth having the bath anyways! So I flick on the TV instead to see what films are on and as usual the aerial is playing up so I guess I’ll maybe look at all those emails I was sent yesterday.
Some pre-reading, some books I’ve never heard of, maybe they will have them in the library? A workbook? Why would they create a workbook? Surely they don’t have enough time to spend writing this? But if THIS is their job, then I guess they would! Or maybe they earn enough to pay someone else to do it for them?
Wait, this workbook makes no sense.
Lots of blank spaces to answer questions. What do I know that I don’t do? Hang on, I’ve read that wrong. ‘What do I know how to do but I don’t do?’ How do I know if I don’t do it? What am I supposed to be doing that I know how to do?
I scan over a few more of the questions. A few diagrams. Some information that is very in line with my thinking actually! Why should we have to feel so stuck, doing the same thing, day in, day out? Spending our weekends recovering and recuperating from the working week to make sure we are fit for work on Monday morning? Because if we go in to work not at our best, or phone in sick because we had a fun weekend, we get it in the neck. How dare we enjoy our free time and impact our work!
This is interesting actually… Some really good points that are getting me thinking.
Why is life this way? Who decided it had to be this way? What stops us from making changes? I keep scanning… Something called a Paradigm?? Never heard of that! Apparently, I’ll find out tomorrow what that means and how it is controlling 95% of everything I do!
The next email really does catch my attention though… I can have anything I want if I simply decide I can have it. All I have to do is act like I’ve already got it, and it will be delivered. That seems REALLY farfetched to me… If all I had to do was think about something and it will then appear, why don’t I have the things I want already?
I keep reading. Paying a little more attention now.
Ah, there is the catch! Everything, be it a human, a seed, an idea, takes time to grow. It has to first be planted, then it grows in its incubator (be it a womb, soil, or a mind) for a certain amount of time before it is ready to be born into the physical world. But while we know the gestation period of a human or most seeds, an idea needs an unknown time to grow. It depends on the size of the idea.
Some ideas, some thoughts, come about very quickly. Some take a lot, lot longer.
All we must do is focus on what we want and take actions towards it. But the email doesn’t say what actions to take. It just gives the phrase;
“I am so happy and grateful now that…”
And says to fill in the thing that we want as if we already have it. To write the thing we want in the present tense. I want so many things… I wouldn’t know what to write after that sentence starter!
So I decide to text my friend.
“Just looking through all these emails you’ve sent over for the webinar tomorrow. I have to say, my mind is being blown! Where did you learn all this?? How does it work?”
I make myself a nice hot drink while I wait for a reply.
Ping!
The reply says;
“I learnt it from my mentor after coming across a really interesting book. Then I went to a seminar with them and that was it! I was hooked. Definitely check out some of the books on the reading list if you get chance as well as join us tomorrow and I’ll explain more then. I don’t mean to be rude, just out for dinner with my team ahead of tomorrow’s session. See you tomorrow!”
Wow. Out for dinner with people you work with? My workplace only go out for drinks and that always seems to end in a disagreement or worse… I decide to shake that memory and look back at the book list. One in particular catches my attention:
“You Are A Badass” by Jen Sincero.
Well at least I know what to do tomorrow morning before the webinar! I think I’ll take a trip to the library to see what I can find from these titles as they are very intriguing. That could definitely be more interesting that playing dodge the dog poo or spending the day in my PJs!
I check my watch. Just after 10pm. TV still not working, I’ve read all the emails, maybe it’s just time for bed.
Saturday morning.
I am awake at 7am?
This is very unusual for me! I turn over and try to snooze.
7:15am. Snoozing. Isn’t. Working! My mind is buzzing with the book titles, so I check what time the library opens. 10am on a Saturday. What to do until then…
The library is near to the local supermarket so I could go and do my food shop then pop into the library, get a library card and get some books to have a flick through before the webinar starts at 12. If I walk to the supermarket then that will take me a good hour, and save me a couple quid on the bus fare as well. So I get up, breakfast, get dressed, write my shopping list, put the washing on, have a quick tidy up round the house, few more faffing bits to try and not be out the door before half past 8.
The sky is cloudy and threatening, but no rain just yet, and there is a pleasant breeze blowing. It’s not too cold, but a good temperature for walking. It’s a nice walk to the supermarket, and it feels good to be out in the fresh air, stretching my legs and letting my mind wander through various things such as the leaves falling, the different cars driving past, different displays in shop windows. Then onto my list again. The things I want.
Again, I start to doubt that I could have any of them, but I decide to simply think about them as if I could have anything I want. Just like the email said was possible. I keep the phrase in my mind
“I am so happy and grateful now that…”
and start to add things onto the end of it as I walk.
I have a nice big house. Comfortable. In the countryside. Away from other people with lots of gardens, woods, and nature around me.
I have a job where I choose my own hours and get paid a lot more money than I do now.
I go on holidays at least every other month for at least a week. Exploring different countries and cultures and meeting new people, learning new things. I travel like a local rather than a tourist.
I come back into the real world briefly to cross the main road.
Then I keep walking.
Before I know it, I am at the supermarket and an hour has felt like the blink of an eye and my right ear is really burning! Luckily it is a fairly straight walk as I don’t actually remember how I arrived here!
I do the shopping, comparing prices, looking for deals, the usual. I am still not sure if I will have a job next week, so I am mindful of how much I am spending. Pack my backpack ready for the walk home and then I pay and head to the library.
Still 10 minutes before it opens so I open up the email and make sure that the list of books is easy to find.
It takes about 5 minutes to set up my account and then I ask if I can get something printed. It is as simply as logging into one of the computers, going on my email and then clicking print. I have to use my card at the printer and poof! The workbook is printed, and the librarian even staples it for me. I ask where the personal development books are and the librarian shows me the sections, I put my bag down out of the way and start searching.
How to be a Badass literally jumps out at me as I reach the authors with S in their surname!
Then I start looking for a couple of the others that were mentioned. Atomic Habits by James Clear, and then a couple by Neville Goddard. They don’t stock the one mentioned on the reading list, but they do have a couple of others, so I grab those instead.
Four should do for a start! I don’t get that much time to read at the moment anyways.
I book the books out and then head to the bus stop as the rain is starting to fall now and I don’t fancy getting these books wet, or myself for that matter! The webinar is also due to start in just over an hour and I still need to unpack the shopping, sort the washing and make some lunch. Taking the bus will also allow me to start flicking through these books. I’m sure I can stretch to a couple quid to save myself time and discomfort!
The bus is on time, must be a Saturday morning thing, and not busy.
I pay my fare, grab a seat, put the bag down and pull out Jen Sincero’s book first. The first paragraphs immediately grab my attention, and I almost miss my stop!
“’You can start out with nothing, and out of nothing and out of no way, a way will be made.’ Reverend Michael Bernard Beckwith, former drug enthusiast, turned spiritual enthusiast, turned inspirational badass.
I used to think quotes like this were a bunch of crap. I also didn’t understand what the hell they were talking about. I mean, not that I cared, I was too cool! What little I knew about the self-help / spiritual world I found to be unforgivably cheesy. It reeked of desperation. Rah-rah, churchy-ness and wanted hugs from unappealing strangers.
And don’t even get me started on how grouchy I used to be about God.
At the same time there was all this stuff about my life that I desperately wanted to change and had I been able to bulldoze through my holier-thou-ism, I could have really used some help around here. I mean, overall, I was doing pretty well. I had published a couple of books, had lots of great friends, a close family, an apartment, a car that ran, food, teeth, clothes, clean drinking water… Compared to the majority of the planet, I knew my life was a total cream-puff. But compared to what I knew I was capable of, I knew I was, shall we say, unimpressed.
I always felt like, come-on! This is the best I can do? Really? I’m going to make just enough to pay my rent this month, again? And I’m going to spend another year dating a bunch of weirdos so that I can be in all these wobbly, non-committal relationships and create even more drama. Really? And am I seriously going to question what my deeper purpose is and wallow in the misery of that quagmire for the millionth time?
It. Was. A. Snore.”
I push the button, get off the bus, after nearly missing my stop.
Cross the road and head up to my home without getting too wet. The shopping gets put away, I hang the washing on the airer near the radiator and make myself a quick lunch before turning on the laptop, logging into the webinar and settling myself comfortably on the sofa with a drink as I flick through the workbook.
Some music starts suddenly, and the webinar gets underway.
I would share in detail what happened over that next hour and a half, but I’m honestly at a loss to put it into words!
The main point that I took from the session is simply that we all know how to do better in whatever it is that we are doing, but we simply don’t because of inbuilt conditioning that we pick up from our parents, family, school, friends and workplaces. Sometimes we even pick up ideas from TV, films and books!
Because of this conditioning, we can attend training at work for example, get really hyped and excited and then two weeks later we will still be doing the same things that we were before the training. Can you relate to that?
The other big thing that stood out to me is the fact that we all have the same amount of time. A millionaire has the same number of hours in a day as a homeless person. The difference is what they do with those hours in a day. We all have all the time there is. It is our choice if we spend them in front of the TV or doing extra things around our jobs to create the life that we want to live.
THAT really hit home.
It is our choice what we do with the time that we are given. And the time that we are given is all the time that is available.
I am honestly sat on my sofa blinking and breathing. Looking at the workbook and the copious amounts of notes I have written. No idea where to start.
Ping!
My phone snaps me out of my trance. It’s my friend wanting to know what I thought.
“Wow. I don’t know what to say!”
I reply.
“That’s awesome! What are you going to do to make changes in your life?”
I pause and read the question again before I answer. What are you going to do to make changes in your life? The image of the coffee shop just down the road suddenly pops into my head. There is a sign hanging in the window asking for staff.
“I think I am going to go down to the coffee shop and pick up some extra work! I don’t do much in the evenings or at the weekend, my job isn’t that taxing during the day, I like coffee and hot chocolate, and I’m sick of not having enough money to buy anything I want.”
“Great plan! Keep in touch and let me know how it goes!”
“I will do!”
I jump up off of the sofa, shut the laptop down and start to put my shoes on, catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror in my drab, slightly scruffy clothes and my hair all over the place.
I need to change.
Putting something on that’s a bit smarter, sorting my hair, then putting on my shoes and heading down to the coffee shop seems like a better approach.
I realise as I walk that I have no idea what I am doing or what is spurring me on! But the idea has been planted and I feel like I am on autopilot! My right ear is literally on fire, but it feels strangely good rather than bad.
The coffee shop is quiet. I say hello to the barista behind the counter and I ask to speak to the manager. They disappear and then the manager comes out behind the barista. I introduce myself and motion to the advert in the window. They order us some drinks and guide me to a table by the window for a chat.
All the usual interview type questions, mainly around why I want to do the role and what my experience is. I decide that the truth is the better option and mention my weekday job, how I feel like there should be more to life, and I want some extra cash. Briefly I mention an inspiring webinar I attended, and the conversation turns towards their background and how they built this coffee shop up from an idea shortly after leaving school.
I was hooked on their story!
It is so inspiring listening to them. They went through school, being picked on and bullied. They got mediocre grades, decided that university or college wasn’t really for them, and managed to start working in a coffee shop to make ends meet and earn a bit of money to cover themselves in case their parents decided to kick them out. Which they eventually did.
And when they got kicked out they decided to open their own coffee shop. So they went to the local bank, mentioned their idea and what they wanted to do, and they managed to get a loan! And poof! This coffee shop was born!
Since that first coffee shop, which is the one I am sitting in with this person right now, they have started another three. All in our city. But four coffee shops, all from one little idea of I don’t want to go and work for someone else.
It was so inspiring!
We seem to hit it off really really nicely, and I’m invited to pop in tomorrow morning to do a trial, and also to provide some background details (I guess to make sure I’m not a psycho!!). I’m quite excited actually!!
I smile as I close the door to my home. Today has actually been quite an interesting and life changing kind of day! I text my friend to say thank you, have a shower and some dinner. I work on my CV a little bit so it is ready for tomorrow, I’m not sure how to get it printed but that’s a tomorrow problem, then I settle down into bed to read some more of “You Are A Badass”. Good night!
What Do You Think?
So what do you think? Comment below with your feedback and where you would like to see Morgan’s story go or where you think it will go! I only have a rough outline plan so far so your input could guide it in another direction…
If this story resonates with you and you want to discuss this further, then get in touch today. Either here or through any of my social medias or schedule a call to discuss it with me directly.
I look forward to speaking with you soon.
To your success,
Jaiye
PS.
Don’t forget to come and join me live if it hasn’t gone past the 24th December 2024 yet! I go live with a new chapter every Tuesday and Thursday on my Linked In, Facebook and YouTube channels and you are more than welcome to join me. Register now!
